new low.... made out with someone while peeing
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
No need to clean the puke on the driveway. The squirrel is eating it up.
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
I taped Calvin and Kyles heads together face to face while they were passed out. You should have seen them stumbling around using hungover teamwork trying to find scissors.
I hit him with a car. Nothing says I hate you more than backing into someone with a fucking car.
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
Had to belly crawl across the floor to the toilet with my eyes closed to puke my life out without making my hangover worse. Three times.
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
how I know last night was a good night: this morning I found a bottle of tapatio, a bag of chicken and a bag of popcorn in my purse.
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
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