It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
are you so shy because you have an std?
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
Sexting Captain while emailing my eharmony match about my low key weekend is hard.
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
Sometimes i wish my vagina automatically turned itself off when i'm legally drunk.
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize
