Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
I don't judge her for getting booty calls at 2 in the morning, so she can't judge me for staying in friday nights and putting spray cheese on pringles.
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
Just applied for assistance with paying my hospital bill from my alcohol poisoning at age 16 while still a little drunk from last night. What is my life.
Circle of life?
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
STOP HOOKING UP WITH SOCCER MOMS! YOU ARE RUINING MY REPUTATION!
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
I dropped my slice of pineapple on the kitchen floor and was just staring at it about to cry. It was really good pineapple.
Randomize
