Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
i celebrated the independence of our country by dry heaving tequila all morning. so classy. happy 4th.
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
On a scale of 1 to hungover I’m definitely throwing up at the office today.
Randomize
