So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
Change your flight to Denver. That's where my penis is.
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
I love you with the passion of a thousand FUCKBOYS during the height of week 1 texting
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when I get back.
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize
