If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
i wish i could just hire someone to go down on me every night until i fall asleep
Shes in the fridge organizing my beer collection. I love having a girlfriend with OCD
i crunched every chip from the dorito bag and poured it in the vase. never again will i have to deal with cool ranch fingers.
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
No he didn't understand the sequence...then I started texting him these texts with vagina strategically spelt correctly in jumbles of letters.
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
If I wake up with an unknown penis in me one more time I am literally going to press charges to the makers of tequila.
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
Randomize
