this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
so I called to to smoke and you didn't pick up so I smoked and now I'm a race car
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
I wouldn't accept the money so he folded the $20 bill into an origami puppy and left a note saying "Not blowjob money"
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
Sorry. My phone died in the middle of you explaining why we would never work as a couple. Whatever you were gonna say, I probably agree.
Nothing screams "crazy cat lady" like a nursery in your house when you're over 30, single and have no kids.
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
I should have known when she mixed malibu and V8. It smelled just like tanning oil and when she drank it she said "Oh well, not the first time."
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
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