you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
You're the end to all my bad dreams.
Did you have that reoccuring dream about me banging your mom again?
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
Just got a ride from a stranger while walking a mile home as it hailed with no coat. He asked me if I smoked, then said he just made some potent cookies and I could have one.
The cookie was what I originally wanted to tell you. Always say yes to drugs from strangers
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
I know you think you’re ready to graduate but just keep these things in mind: taxes, I get up at 5 AM every morning, I have to buy vegetables when I go grocery shopping, and I can’t wear sweat pants to work. Take that victory lap and enjoy the sweat pants and bar hopping because it goes downhill real quick.
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
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