I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
i got pulled over in my 'cops love me' tshirt. he didn't think it was funny when i pointed it out.
Why are you covered in frosting?
Friend's birthday situation turned into enlightened cake orgy.
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
turns out that the cat the james was trying to catch was a raccoon. call me when you get this, i need an ER buddy
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
Why did I wake up with condoms on all my fingers?
Considering the girl you hooked up with, I'd be concerned about not having one on your penis.
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
Hate my fucking roommates.... Seriously, who the FUCK peels potatoes in the bathroom sink?!
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