Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
Being this Hungover on Easter has brought my closer to Jesus... I swear he had to feel shitty like this after coming back from the dead
He's my palate cleanser. He's my mint sorbet. He's my saltine cracker. He's who I fuck between people to make the next one better.
she tossed me in the back of the car and said "god gave u the gift of life and I wanna swallow it"
Real friends wouldn't let me shotgun a 4loko after already seeing me trying to eat a girl out through her jeans.
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
So on a scale of 1 to Friendship-Over, how mad would you be if a rando I brought home sharted on the shag carpet in the living room?
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
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