I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
just woke up and this girl had my cellphone nestled in the front of her thong. i kept thinking "is this a trap?"
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
Just paid my credit card bill at the bar. This phone makes it so I never have to leave
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
She's in the hospital because she tried to steal a toilet seat from an outhouse and fell off the bank. We're gonna hang the toilet seat by the pool.
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
So we hooked up and then instead of texting me, he endorsed me on LinkedIn for Microsoft Word a few days later
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
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