I just spit my fake tooth out at a customer. I think he thought it was my bubble gum though so it's ok.
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
homeboy just tried to sext with me at 8:30 in the morning while I was on a job interview...
so you did it...
obv...but still...it was inconsiderate.
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
Randomize
