I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
disregard all texts ive sent you minus taco motherfucking bell
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
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