He asked to "fluff my boner.."
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
I still think it's messed up that you're naming your kids after all the guys you slept with in college
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
She was so morning drunk she asked the lady at brueggers for a bandaid and my self respect back
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
We were in the middle of a serious discussion about social justice and he pulled sequins out of his teeth and kept talking like nothing had happened.
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
Randomize