no. you can't hotbox the world.
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
My costume for the end of the world party was a success. Everyone in the ER thought I was there because I got hit by a car when it was actually from alcohol poisoning.
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
Trust me, dating 38 and 20 year old dudes at the same time is the best. Money plus all of the sex. Finally figured out this relationship thing.
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
I JUST BROKE A NAIL MASTURBATING. WTF I could even enjoy my orgasm bc now I'm gonna have to spend $50 on my nails.
I don't know when he had the time to do it but he dug a hole in our basement like the shawshank redemption
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
He said they were his favorite shoes.. So I threw one down the sewer. Now he'll keep searching the house for the other one. Sweet silent revenge.
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
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