The child next door sounds like he's having vigorous sex in the backyard and it's making me very, very uncomfortable. I don't want to look.
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
Remember when I was so high that I thought my appendix burst? All I had to do was fart man, just fart.
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
We haven't even eaten dinner yet and she's already been asked to "take it down a notch" by the groom's mom.
Woke up the day after the party with a bruise on my stomach. Pretty sure my liver was trying to escape for fear of it's life.
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
I'm just now realizing I've slept with guys from three different decades over the past year. That's gotta be some sort of record.
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