i just realized Britney Spears and I are more alike than I thought. Both of us have our parents in complete control of our lives, we both have restraining orders on previous boyfriends, and we all know both of us can put on a hell of a show
I like how you refer to peeing in the car as "super cute"
Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
You're wrong. It's my BIRTHDAY. We all know it's impossible to get pregnant on my diva day!
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
Are you saying being a wizard and going to hogwarts wouldn't be life changing, believe in magic you fucking muggle
YOU LEFT MY FUCKING BRA OUTSIDE OF YOUR HOUSE AND NEVER TEXTED ME.
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
Randomize
