No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
I air guitared a man's prosthetic leg on the bar to Bruce Springsteen. That's how it's going
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
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