we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
He was drunk at Denny's at 5 am saying how Dear John was the worst movie he has ever seen... eyes filled with tears.
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
My new best friend is the drag queen who works at mcdonalds and doesnt judge me during my walk of shame coffee break
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
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