If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
the cops didnt even say happy birthday to me :(
I am sitting on the floor by my oven watching my cookie dough blossom. This is a whole new level of fat
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
She vajazzled her vag. It was as useless as putting earrings on chewbacca
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
Randomize
