I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
I did my walk of shame through a safeway at 8am to get YOUR hangover bagels. You're welcome asshole
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
She's walking to the bar while holding a fifth of fireball, talking on the phone and puking like its nothing out of the ordinary
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
Randomize
