Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
You need to come get me. I'm pretty sure that gravity's going to crush my brain
Your cat is quite the conversationalist after some tequila and shrooms
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
Where the condoms are as broken as my dreams
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
Just walked into the supermarket puking into a plastic bag while wearing my favorite Bob Ross shirt. I am a human disaster.
Randomize
