So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
If I can't pick up a cat lady, I probably need to turn to Internet dating.
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
They have 12 kegs and 40 bottles of liquor and a pool with a diving board. And hardly anyone at this wedding knows me. Should be a great night
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
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