so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
she made me take her to the grocery store to buy a gallon of sweet tea and a shit ton of band aids, the cashier asked if someone was hurt and she replied "not yet.."
I'm going to practice throwing things up the the air and catching them between my boobs, because that seems like a cool party trick.
Is it bad of me to apply as a night shift counselor at a boys orphanage purely because of how laid that would get me at bars?
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
It has been so long since I got any action that I have decided to change my vagina's name from "the chamber of judgement" to "the cave of forgotten dreams".
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
Have you ever eaten pizza and gotten your dick sucked at the same time? Because I have pizza.
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
Randomize