her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
so my daughter wakes me up this morning and i feel like a vibration so im thinking she has my phone..nope my vibrator
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
We were drunk having sex and I knocked over her bedside table/fish bowl and she jumped off to check if her fish was still alive but she made me pasta so it's cool
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
Soooooo I may or may not have accidentally been a catalyst in a destroyed marriage.
I guess I asked for the two old strippers numbers at the end of the bar and it turned out to be the bartenders mom and aunt...
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
Randomize
