Don't you send me to vm
Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
We have to go find her fucking car. She came home from a 80 dollar cab ride, no shoes, and all she remembers is its at a burger king on a street with an H in it
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
We almost forgot to tip the maids, so we left the rest of the gin, some tonic water and a lime. They earned it
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
Got cut off last night cuz this chick had her hands down my shorts and was blatantly playing with my dick while I was trying to order. apparently that's "frowned upon"
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
Nothing says "sober up, you whore" quite like an early morning PAP smear.
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
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