he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
How do I tell my mom that she just went to the gym with my water bottle filled with vodka...
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
Just saw a cougar do the walk of shame. She asked housekeeping where the fastest elevator was.
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
All I know is that I'm not gonna send out SOS messages via twitter for your rescue this time.
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
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