Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
Woke up with an epic boner today, the kind where you can spin books and shit on it. FYI: don't try spinning an encyclopedia
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
My liver was like a college freshman on spring break. It would've danced topless on tables if it could have.
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
Nothing says I love you as your fiancé bringing back home your drunk brother from his own stag party
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
A toast to whoever set this year's daylight savings fallback to the day after halloween, granting us another hour to detox before we pretend to be functional adults. Clearly, a partier with forethought and clear priorities. Cheers!
How do I stop your cat from bathing me? I'm afraid she'll get drunk off my sweat
Randomize
