we're blogging at a bar
apparently i peed in my fridge last night because my vegetable drawer was filled with it.
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
On the plus side this hangover is the tipping point that finally convinced my lazy ass to get some sunglasses.
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
as i sobered up i realized that her cute accent was actually a speech impediment
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
... Okay, fine. But I don't want to be a better person tonight. I'll be a better person tomorrow.
Im eating leftover Easter ham in a bubble bath. What has my life come to?
I know this sounds fake but she's deep frying a bar of soap right now
Come fucking get her
I don’t have the time, patience, or blood alcohol level to deal with her.
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
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