I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
It made me feel like I need a reality show of my life so I could go back and watch the episodes to figure out how I got from the trunk of the car to my neighbors tree house...
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
You can't talk like Dr. Evil to me five minutes after the greatest orgasm of my life.
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
Randomize
