gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
i really wish my pants would only unzip when im sober
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
Oh god. I asked to "play his sexaphone" which I though was a super sex way to say "let me blow you". He fucking walked home at 4:30am
Did you drink ALL that 151??
No. We drank all the jaeger... Then used the 151 to start the fire. We're also out of paper towels... And your hairspray is flammable.
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
I love Texas men! TSA agent found my vibrator, nodded approvingly, and said, “You have a nice night, ma’am” with a cowboy accent. I almost made out with him on the spot
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