I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
Sometimes you just need a break, and sometimes you also need to get stoned on these breaks. I sound like some kind of fucked up mr rogers when I say shit like that.
You insisted on calling your mixture of Bacardi & powdered milk "a Jamacian Facial."
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
Well my grandma put the turkey in the oven for 4 hours and didn't have the oven on.
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
Of two things I'm absolutely sure: 1. I only took 2 hits off that joint and 2. I definitely ran over hedwig on the way home
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
Sorry didnt text you yesterday. had to put restraining order on my ex.
You just sent a mass text asking if anyone ever drank the blood of a goat in the glorious name of Satan...after that we confiscated any writing utensil
Randomize