you traded sex for a burrito?
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
Are you good with a knife? I need someone to perform amateur surgery.
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
Randomize
