Looks like an M-80 went off in a lb. of pastrami
oh my god. my mom just found my pipe. she thought it was a dildo.
like i said, there should be a sitcom about your family.
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
I was too drunk to read the menu, let alone her body language.
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
We got to the hotel at 12AM with nothing but a plastic bag of magnum condoms and lube, while wearing glow sticks. The receptionist handed us a bunch of water bottles and said "These are on us.", not even phased by three dudes about to have a threesome. I love this town.
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
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