More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays.
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
Do you think they make a "sorry in my drunken debauchery I dropped a pumpkin off the balcony and you happened to be standing right there/get well soon" card?
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
what are you getting to drink for new years?
well seeing as how i just got diagnosed with a uti, whatever we can mix with cranberry juice
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
Randomize
