Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
i can feel the knowledge leaking out of my brain
replace it with alcohol - nature abhors a vacuum
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
I had a 10 minute conversation with the refrigerator, it was telling me how it likes to be opened and closed. Ecstasy, I love you.
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
I don't know when he had the time to do it but he dug a hole in our basement like the shawshank redemption
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
you have to get here a cop came into the bar and she looks like Sarah Palin. I think I'm gonna try and bang her
Randomize
