well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
I drove to my yoga class while eating a piece of bacon. Wow. I see myself in a whole new light.
just saw a midget ride a motorized cooler into the liquor store. i'm gonna follow him home.
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
Found my wallet. It was under my dresser with a note that said "good job you found me". Drunk me is an ass.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
Slow dancing with the chandelier.
I'm sorry I didn't respond. I had a shit day. However, I just masturbated to Adele's Rolling In the Deep while crying. It was oddly therapeutic.
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
Randomize
