Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
my ass just sighed. even my farts are tired.
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
The only birthday messages I got from men were from my 8th grade boyfriend and the bouncer at our bar. I think I'm doing something wrong in life.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
My ex-fiancee UPS-ed me a sixer of tall boys, and a fifth of bourbon for christmas, from halfway across the country. What does this mean?
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
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