I'm gonna cuddle the shit out of you tomorrow
Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
It's probably just the physical manifestation of slut karma. But i of course mean that in the kindest way possible because i love you and respect your choices
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
On the train at 650am after a night of clubbing and running away from a new zealander who was buying us beers but also licking windows
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
Dude I may be rolling but there's no way I can make up a 12 ft tall giant green man waving to me right now
False alarm, security just told me it's a radio tower
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