Wow so 15 missed calls, a vm AND a text saying come downstairs? ...And where is downstairs? Explain.
I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
Randomize
