In debating whether or not it's worth getting out of bed and walking 5 feet down the hallway to go to the bathroom before I puke
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
That awkward moment when the dude you blew on camera in college friend requests you on Facebook.
Who is this?!????
That awkward moment when you think you're texting a friend the above statement, but instead you text a stranger.
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
Just woke up next to a hungry lesbian and a half eaten croissant on my stomach. Can you come get me?
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
Randomize
