I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
My nephew just came out playing with my moms vibrator.
It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
You don't care if I shave my legs, but you insist I be conscious for sex. Whatever. I really think your priorities are out of whack.
"DO YOU LIKE FLYING KITES" WORKED AS A PICKUP LINE. SUCK IT.
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
Randomize
