fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
She was drunk and kept trying to talk while I was in her mouth. It sounded like the teacher from a Charlie Brown cartoon!
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
Taking shots with an iv of fluids in, because I work tomorrow. That's responsibility. Employee of the month right here.
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
Eric was just sitting there open-mouthed swallowing sake from that squirt bottle for so long the lady across from us leaned over to her kid and told him not to end up like "the big alcoholic one"
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
"Being an adult" and "being happy" are two circles that do not overlap in my Venn diagram of life.
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
He wouldn’t know a good thing if it bit him on the ass. Which, btw, I did.
Randomize
