adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
there is vomit in the pocket of my dress coat. i remember thinking "this is a weird place to puke" at some point in the evening, but i dont understand how i did this.
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
My penis needs a shock collar
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
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