She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
Grumpy Cat is dead and fuck EVERYTHING.
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
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