Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
Just found out that I was singing john legend songs as I threw up last night. Quality.
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
I didn't pay for a single drink 'help me I'm poor' was my drink pickup line. it totally worked.
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
Randomize
