I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
Eating Doritos is not nearly as enjoyable when I'm not drunkenly feeding them to peacocks.
We just passed a billboard that said to join "jerseydoesntstink.com" and literally 15 seconds later, we could smell jersey.
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
on the list of things i learned today that are not stripper poles: ex-boyfriends, table legs, and police officers.
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
He texted his hospitalized grandma while inside me, so really a perfect gentleman.
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