Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
dude i feel like at any given point 3/5 of that family is trying to fuck you
you just kept bragging about how there was a "pretty large" chance that you had pooped on the same toilet as George Clooney
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
If anyone remembers any details of tonight please address concerns to my lawyer. This is a mass text.
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
My uterus is doing all sorts of karate moves to break free of my body.
I farted in the parking garage and it echoed.
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize
