I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
In case you were wondering, taking me to see beauty and the beast in theaters would totally get you an unsolicited sloppy beej in the parking lot afterwards.
You should probably take note of that and make it happen.
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
Hey where the fuck is the rest of my beer? Lets start this day off right
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
I've broken 3 vibrators in the past month because I apparently am "too rough" with them. Is that even possible?!
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
Randomize
