Dual....:-)
Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
Fell down a spiral staircase. Et tu vodka. Et tu.
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
Blow job season was short but glorious.
A fair warning: I don't think a cop will let you off the hook just because your birthday is on New Year's Eve
I saved him in my phone as "Well-Hung Burrito Savior." I love Taco Tuesday.
I'm going to invent an ap that tests your stress levels before texting and will say something like "nope, go rub one out and try again in 10 min"
just caught myself putting beer in the oven and pizza in the fridge. i should be a trainwreck by tonight.
Randomize
