i never thought i'd have to say "please stop having sex on me"
wow.
yeah, it was that bad.
he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
Wake up. Finish House of Cards. Put on pants.
Accurate.
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
A stripper choked me last night. Then I choked her. Now we're going on a date this Saturday.
Randomize
